Source 4: The pursuit of happiness
20 What is the secret to happiness? Most of our ability to be happy is based on genes some people are just naturally happier than others. But research suggests that 40% of people’s happiness comes from the choices they make. “The idea that you can’t be happier is false,” says Dr. Robert Waldinger, director of the
longest–running study on happiness, the Harvard Study on Adult
Development. “We now know a great deal about what does and does not contribute to wellbeing and happiness.”
Traits and behaviors
21 The Harvard Study has followed 724 men since they were teenagers in 1938. The original group consisted of men from Boston’s poorest neighborhoods and Harvard undergrads, including President John F. Kennedy.
Over the years, the researchers collected all kinds of health information, including medical exam data, blood samples, and brain scans. Every two years, they asked participants questions about their work and home lives and mental and emotional wellness. They even interviewed family members.
22 The researchers found that certain traits and behaviors were associated with increased levels of happiness as the groups aged. For example:
23 Letting go. As people get older, they tend to focus more on what is important to them, and do not sweat the small stuff to the degree they did when they were younger.
Other research echoes this and has found that older adults are better about letting go of toxic relationships and past failures. “They realize how short life is, and they pay more attention to what makes them happy,” says Dr. Waldinger.
24 Staying connected. Loneliness can be a greater health risk than smoking, according to some research.
The Harvard Study found a strong connection between happiness and close relationships with a spouse, family, and friends. “Personal connection creates mental and emotional stimulation, which are automatic mood boosters, while isolation is a mood buster,” says Dr. Waldinger.
25 Get involved. Volunteering provides a sense of purpose and improves your mood. A study published online
26 Revisit your childhood. What did you enjoy when you were younger? Singing? Playing games? Doing certain hobbies? “When you are older, you have more opportunity to return to the activities you associate with happiness,” says Dr. Waldinger.
27 Buy time and not “things.” Money cannot buy happiness, but how you spend it can affect your well being, suggests a study in the Aug. 8, 2017, Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.
For example, when people spend money on time–saving services, such as house cleaning, lawn care, or grocery delivery, it can make them feel happier.
By comparison, money spent on material purchases is less likely to create positive emotions. The reason? Investing in time may allow people to enjoy more pleasurable activities as well as reduce the stress of daily chores.
28 Join a support group. You cannot escape life’s turbulent times. Eventually, you will struggle with an illness, the loss of a loved one, or some other kind of emotional hardship that lessens your happiness.
“Connecting with other people who are facing a similar problem can help buffer the pain,” says Dr. Waldinger.
“You are reminded that you are not alone in your struggle.”